Lasy to write the date again. My last desire. What is it? Well, It's to leave online world, Msn, Fb~ Everything. I'm stopping them all and whenever I take a beautiful picture I'll post it here~ Weird? Awkward? Nope. My decision is made. I don't want to be a fool. I guess as for online. I can give my brother all my eq's and when I want to play back only I on. But that would have to take a long long time. I don't want to online and suffer anyway. Haha I've to be a strong turtle!!! Remember I'm Turtle Yuki ! Nothing can defeat me! Haha~ Except exams! Haha.
Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee~ I'll still blog~!! Haha
-Yuki-TURTLE-
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Happy?
18/08/10-Wednesday.
Today's exam wasn't stressful at all! My economy was a little uneasy but I did my best! Haha As for Accounts, guess what? There was 3 question I did them all in half an hour. Few minutes before times up I check and I found out i missed the lejar part!! OMG!! I did as quick as I could and finished it just as the bell rang! Haha~ Lucky me! Then I checked the text book I did wrongly!!! OMG~!!! Ah well, Nevermind! Now mistake next time must be better!!
Middle of morning I woke up missing my drama that ended. The show actually wasn't really a blast but I still love it. Questioning myself why. I've got the answers in the end. I love the drama a lot was cause thats the only thing that cheers me up. Dramas + Music is my soul. From now, I'm not putting my mind on anything else. Just studies and my future path. Friends? Lover? No thanks. I don't want to be related in anymore drama's for now. I've had enough for the time being.
Come to think of it, My friend is right. Online is just online. Using people for eq's and all does not have anything to do with reality. But why am I so sensitive or is it just too.. stupid? I've started to think of leaving Twinki Ro. Maybe for a week and more. I just don't want it to affect my life. No matter what happens. It's just online. Maybe leaving it, playing for just an hour it's enough? Whenever I come up to the topic of online. I tend to have many words to say. But in the end, the words can never be spoken out. Even towards you. I'm sorry. It's hard to keep it all inside me but if I say it out. There will still be no change. I just don't want online to affect my daily life. Let that be my excuse. I guess I need to tell my dear first. As for the rest there's no need. It's not reality. Whats the use even if they know?
Why am I thinking reality. Saying goodbye and all. I guess I'll just stop. I don't even want to see anyone there. Right this second I want to stop but another second I just want to online. Please, I hope I can just focus on my studies. If I don't online I can still study! There's many things I can do. I can even go shopping and not care. No one will remember me. It's just a game yuki! A GAME! GET A GRIP "XIAO YA TOU" !!!!!! THERE'S NO NEED TO BE SAD OR ANYTHING. REALITY IS REALITY BUT THIS IS ONLINE !!! O-N-L-I-N-E!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...
I don't know what should I do nor say. I guess goobye is the word? Don't worry I'll still be blogging to release a few of stress / hyper words.
-Yuki [XiAoYaToU] -
Today's exam wasn't stressful at all! My economy was a little uneasy but I did my best! Haha As for Accounts, guess what? There was 3 question I did them all in half an hour. Few minutes before times up I check and I found out i missed the lejar part!! OMG!! I did as quick as I could and finished it just as the bell rang! Haha~ Lucky me! Then I checked the text book I did wrongly!!! OMG~!!! Ah well, Nevermind! Now mistake next time must be better!!
Middle of morning I woke up missing my drama that ended. The show actually wasn't really a blast but I still love it. Questioning myself why. I've got the answers in the end. I love the drama a lot was cause thats the only thing that cheers me up. Dramas + Music is my soul. From now, I'm not putting my mind on anything else. Just studies and my future path. Friends? Lover? No thanks. I don't want to be related in anymore drama's for now. I've had enough for the time being.
Come to think of it, My friend is right. Online is just online. Using people for eq's and all does not have anything to do with reality. But why am I so sensitive or is it just too.. stupid? I've started to think of leaving Twinki Ro. Maybe for a week and more. I just don't want it to affect my life. No matter what happens. It's just online. Maybe leaving it, playing for just an hour it's enough? Whenever I come up to the topic of online. I tend to have many words to say. But in the end, the words can never be spoken out. Even towards you. I'm sorry. It's hard to keep it all inside me but if I say it out. There will still be no change. I just don't want online to affect my daily life. Let that be my excuse. I guess I need to tell my dear first. As for the rest there's no need. It's not reality. Whats the use even if they know?
Why am I thinking reality. Saying goodbye and all. I guess I'll just stop. I don't even want to see anyone there. Right this second I want to stop but another second I just want to online. Please, I hope I can just focus on my studies. If I don't online I can still study! There's many things I can do. I can even go shopping and not care. No one will remember me. It's just a game yuki! A GAME! GET A GRIP "XIAO YA TOU" !!!!!! THERE'S NO NEED TO BE SAD OR ANYTHING. REALITY IS REALITY BUT THIS IS ONLINE !!! O-N-L-I-N-E!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...
I don't know what should I do nor say. I guess goobye is the word? Don't worry I'll still be blogging to release a few of stress / hyper words.
-Yuki [XiAoYaToU] -
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Exams? Stress?
17/08/10,Tuesday.
It's the second day of exam week. The whole time feeling so stress forcing myself to study. I know if I don't blog now, my mood will go bad again. Two reasons, I've been thinking of something lately don't know why. Aihss. Also, MY ANOTHER FAVOURITE DRAMA ENDED! Ending was awesome. Only thing now I'm planning to buy them. You know me right? I collect Love / Adventures Drama~ Haha.
Back to the serious part. I've been thinking of it day and night. Not able to focus. But once I've let it down I'm better. As for my presence in life, I don't think it'll make a difference. Talk to a friend that I once dislike for lying but now I think back, maybe she wasn't? I don't know. All I know is I miss the times I was with her. Come to think of it. When I was with her, I actually know my presence but now she has a new friend. Can't blame her. If it wasn't for me who left her first unable to trust her. I guess it's payback? God's punishment towards me.
I don't really care of my existance anymore. I just want a peaceful life. This sunday there's a competition. I'm going there with my friend. Suppose to call someone follow me. But I've been thinking of only one person but I know it's impossible. I'm not repeating the same mistake again. Online is online. Reality is reality. No matter how beautiful online is, reality it's just a lie and ugly.
I really really want to focus on study and not treat everyone different. I guess I'll just be whoever I want wherever I go. From small, I wished for a wish and I guess until now I'm still wishing. That is to have a best buddy that is seriously close. Like a sister. I had one but she wasn't that ... kind I guess. She has lots of friends I don't mind but she does not even understand me so.. haha. I had another, closest to me last time but still do not understand me. I guess so far there was only one. She knew I was upset but I lied saying I was okay but she still knows. God gave me someone to treasure but I threw her away cause of a lie? Why can't I just trust her? She betrayed me twice but maybe it wasn't her fault? I had another chance and got really close to her. I really care for her like a sister but in return ... it's all my fault I guess. Denying all the facts of truth. I'm sorry. I just wish if time could turn back, I would not know anything about that case. Not a single thing. I just don't want to repeat every mistake all over.
I'm a failure in both friendship and relationship. I don't want to be a failure in studies. I am a failure in studies because I never try. I want to give my best shot now. It's never too late. I hope with my studies I can just achieve my dreams. Forgetting all the sorrows , pain and unhappiness. Back to studies~ Nights.
-Yuki-
It's the second day of exam week. The whole time feeling so stress forcing myself to study. I know if I don't blog now, my mood will go bad again. Two reasons, I've been thinking of something lately don't know why. Aihss. Also, MY ANOTHER FAVOURITE DRAMA ENDED! Ending was awesome. Only thing now I'm planning to buy them. You know me right? I collect Love / Adventures Drama~ Haha.
Back to the serious part. I've been thinking of it day and night. Not able to focus. But once I've let it down I'm better. As for my presence in life, I don't think it'll make a difference. Talk to a friend that I once dislike for lying but now I think back, maybe she wasn't? I don't know. All I know is I miss the times I was with her. Come to think of it. When I was with her, I actually know my presence but now she has a new friend. Can't blame her. If it wasn't for me who left her first unable to trust her. I guess it's payback? God's punishment towards me.
I don't really care of my existance anymore. I just want a peaceful life. This sunday there's a competition. I'm going there with my friend. Suppose to call someone follow me. But I've been thinking of only one person but I know it's impossible. I'm not repeating the same mistake again. Online is online. Reality is reality. No matter how beautiful online is, reality it's just a lie and ugly.
I really really want to focus on study and not treat everyone different. I guess I'll just be whoever I want wherever I go. From small, I wished for a wish and I guess until now I'm still wishing. That is to have a best buddy that is seriously close. Like a sister. I had one but she wasn't that ... kind I guess. She has lots of friends I don't mind but she does not even understand me so.. haha. I had another, closest to me last time but still do not understand me. I guess so far there was only one. She knew I was upset but I lied saying I was okay but she still knows. God gave me someone to treasure but I threw her away cause of a lie? Why can't I just trust her? She betrayed me twice but maybe it wasn't her fault? I had another chance and got really close to her. I really care for her like a sister but in return ... it's all my fault I guess. Denying all the facts of truth. I'm sorry. I just wish if time could turn back, I would not know anything about that case. Not a single thing. I just don't want to repeat every mistake all over.
I'm a failure in both friendship and relationship. I don't want to be a failure in studies. I am a failure in studies because I never try. I want to give my best shot now. It's never too late. I hope with my studies I can just achieve my dreams. Forgetting all the sorrows , pain and unhappiness. Back to studies~ Nights.
-Yuki-
Sunday, August 15, 2010
Echoes.
15/08/10-Sunday.
It's a school day tomorrow but my heart is empty. Can't think of anything right now. Why? 2 reasons. 1 is what I know you hate and I dislike it too. The same thing is happening online. As for the 2nd reason. I might not be able to enter the competition. I was looking foward to it. I don't know what's going to happen but I really hope I have a chance to join it! I don't need anything. I just wanna sing my heart out. All the feelings can be said I guess.
Exam is tomorrow, my thoughts are still flying. Why am I going to open to online guys? I just don't want the same thing to happen all over. Why is it so hard to keep my distance? I just don't understand but I know one thing. I've let down someone. You know who I mean. Anyways, got to sleep. Will update on friday.
-Yuki-
It's a school day tomorrow but my heart is empty. Can't think of anything right now. Why? 2 reasons. 1 is what I know you hate and I dislike it too. The same thing is happening online. As for the 2nd reason. I might not be able to enter the competition. I was looking foward to it. I don't know what's going to happen but I really hope I have a chance to join it! I don't need anything. I just wanna sing my heart out. All the feelings can be said I guess.
Exam is tomorrow, my thoughts are still flying. Why am I going to open to online guys? I just don't want the same thing to happen all over. Why is it so hard to keep my distance? I just don't understand but I know one thing. I've let down someone. You know who I mean. Anyways, got to sleep. Will update on friday.
-Yuki-
It's all the same.
15/08/10, Sunday.
I guess it's all the same. No matter what happens what ever that is said, it's really rare on how you can trust a guys word 100%. Most of them are lies just to impress girls but it's really pathetic. Those guys are really pathetic. Making fake things sound real is it really that fun or nice? Playing with a girls heart is that what guys want?
Just like a game? Making a girl to fall head over heals towards the guy. Once his got her, he just treats her like rubbish or just play with her heart with all his tricks on his sleaves? There might be some guys out there that is different. But what difference does it make? It's just too hard to fully believe a guys word. This is only for relationships i guess. I hope...
-Yuki-
I guess it's all the same. No matter what happens what ever that is said, it's really rare on how you can trust a guys word 100%. Most of them are lies just to impress girls but it's really pathetic. Those guys are really pathetic. Making fake things sound real is it really that fun or nice? Playing with a girls heart is that what guys want?
Just like a game? Making a girl to fall head over heals towards the guy. Once his got her, he just treats her like rubbish or just play with her heart with all his tricks on his sleaves? There might be some guys out there that is different. But what difference does it make? It's just too hard to fully believe a guys word. This is only for relationships i guess. I hope...
-Yuki-
Happy Birthday / Am I just afraid?
15/08/10, Sunday. [Special Day]
Once Again, Happy Birthday to my friend! Haha. Was the first one to wish my friend!! Super happy. Wished my friend in facebook again! Hahas. Okay...
Am I afraid of making memories because when everything is over no memories are left where there is no pain and suffering? I'm kinda positive in the morning so... I guess making memories before leaving should be a good thing. I don't think I'll stop ro cause of my emo-ness. Nothing changes there. Mind as well, keep myself happy before losing everything like a gamble table. Right? Haha, You agree with me. SO, your task is to make sure I don't emo of stupid things!!! Wait. Thats my task !! Sobs.. I guess when I'm emo you'll be the one listening right? Or.. READING~ hahaha
-Yuki-
Once Again, Happy Birthday to my friend! Haha. Was the first one to wish my friend!! Super happy. Wished my friend in facebook again! Hahas. Okay...
Am I afraid of making memories because when everything is over no memories are left where there is no pain and suffering? I'm kinda positive in the morning so... I guess making memories before leaving should be a good thing. I don't think I'll stop ro cause of my emo-ness. Nothing changes there. Mind as well, keep myself happy before losing everything like a gamble table. Right? Haha, You agree with me. SO, your task is to make sure I don't emo of stupid things!!! Wait. Thats my task !! Sobs.. I guess when I'm emo you'll be the one listening right? Or.. READING~ hahaha
-Yuki-
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Word left unspoken.
14/08/10- Saturday.
Once again I'm blogging. Why am I so down? I should know very cleary game is game and reality is reality. Why do people get i right so easily as for me I .... aihs.. Can you teach me? It's half an hour before 15/08... Yeah.... 15/08.. Aihs. Unforgettable? What should I do? Should I dissapear from ro from now on? Should I stop everything? I just don't want to feel over happy over stuff from games when its not even related to real life. Words that speak through my heart. Words I could not say. Looking at the computer screen feeling unhappy. Who knows? By putting a few emoticons, they will be thinking your fine.
But in real life, you're facial expression will be the one that's hiding and words will be said with a smile. Why? Why does it have to be so hard? Am I over-exaggerating? Am I over-sensitive? Am I the main problem?
Gosh, I feel so stupid now. Almost time. I better get going. Nights.
-Yuki-
Once again I'm blogging. Why am I so down? I should know very cleary game is game and reality is reality. Why do people get i right so easily as for me I .... aihs.. Can you teach me? It's half an hour before 15/08... Yeah.... 15/08.. Aihs. Unforgettable? What should I do? Should I dissapear from ro from now on? Should I stop everything? I just don't want to feel over happy over stuff from games when its not even related to real life. Words that speak through my heart. Words I could not say. Looking at the computer screen feeling unhappy. Who knows? By putting a few emoticons, they will be thinking your fine.
But in real life, you're facial expression will be the one that's hiding and words will be said with a smile. Why? Why does it have to be so hard? Am I over-exaggerating? Am I over-sensitive? Am I the main problem?
Gosh, I feel so stupid now. Almost time. I better get going. Nights.
-Yuki-
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